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LMNOP

New York, 1990 :: I lived in a big flat on 14th Street between 2nd & 3rd Avenues with three other guys. After getting frustrated trying to book gigs at New York clubs - and then, when I did get a gig, trying to get friends to come and pay the cover charge + two drink minimum - I decided to put on my own shows.

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Mask

My eighth birthday. I'm guessing I got the mask as a gift, otherwise that would be weird that I'm wearing one in our backyard since we didn't have a pool.

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Pleasantly surprised

Today is "The photo doesn't have to have anything to do with the words" day. I’ve lived in the East Bay for 20 years, and I’m still pleasantly surprised whenever I think I know how to get somewhere and it turns out that I actually do.

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Think of me

Erica was away, and Isabelle was going to a friends house. As she was leaving she said to me:
​​​​​​​“If you get lonely you can just get one of my stuffed animals and think of me.”

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Misplaced

ANUARY 11, 1991. NEW YORK CITY :: Coming back from Davis was a shock. It's so much easier there. New York is such a struggle. Is it because there's just too many people all crammed together, all pushing and shoving to get what they want, to get where they're going? It's like everybody agreed to give up trying to be nice, patient, courteous. "Fuck it. What's in it for me?" Everyone's in survival mode. Get through the day. That's all that matters.

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What's so bad about that?

Doing business development today. Not my favorite thing. I still cringe when I send emails to people I don't know very well, or emails that make me feel desperate, like I need work. Which I do. That's why I'm doing it. So why does sending an honest email make me cringe? Basically all I'm saying is: "Hey, if you need some awesome music I can make it for you." That's pretty straight forward. What's so bad about that? 

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Go team!

I played on the high school football team for one year. I didn't get to play much, which sucked and was embarrassing, but then I was relieved to learn that most people didn't really pay attention to who played in the game and who didn't. so I always got a "Good job!" if the team won, even when I didn't play at all, and I wasn't above accepting a compliment for something I had nothing to do with. Any attention I could get was welcome.

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Vendor: one that vends

One of the first times my group was hired to perform at a private event I received an email titled "Vendor Walkthrough", which gave the date and time vendors were to arrive for a walkthrough of the venue. The caterer and designer and rental company were included on the list. At first I assumed that it was sent to me by mistake, but then realized I was a vendor. Of music. Previously I had been a cool dude in a band, now I was a music vendor. Like a vending machine, except instead of chips, sodas or candy bars, I dispensed music. 

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It wasn't easy

Hi... I really don't know what to say because I'm kind of embarrassed about writing to you. I know the first thing you are going to wonder is where I got your address. Well, it wasn't easy…

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Day 300

Every day for the last 300 hundred days I've engaged with this project. I've tried to make it interesting and worthwhile. I've been frustrated, discouraged, and annoyed by it. I've been inspired and elevated by it. At this point it's just part of my day. 

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